Today went fast. Classes, food, more classes, homework. Tonight I am broken, tired, fake. I hate feeling fake.

I am pondering on my flaws, my shames, my uglyness. I am a man now. I am engaged. I am a Christian. I feel like a sack of flesh, intricately designed but I've forgotten what for, deeply loved but I don't know why. Forgiven... and a sinner. I feel like a fraud. I feel like an empty prayer, a hollow heart, a shallow soul.
My soul thirsts for God. I cry out in my distress. CAN YOU HEAR ME